• Nicola Shelley

NLP - A bit of demystification

When I introduce myself as a Life Coach quite a few people know what that is. When I say I use N.L.P. quite a lot of people don't know what that is and when I explain it stands for Neuro Linguistic Programming, some take quite an alarmed step backwards!

So a little demystification here. N.L.P. is a way of looking at how language can affect our behaviour and thoughts. In truth is is more than that but it's a good place to start!

You can read about it, but as one of my fellow trainees said: 'I've read so many books on it and it still hasn't come to life yet. The only way to really learn about it is to do it.' I'll add to this too - it is quite difficult (in my opinion) to do N.L.P. to yourself having read a book. It works better if you can be free to talk and allow someone else to manage the process.

Here's an example of N.L.P. in action and how language can affect your thoughts and subsequent behaviour.

Let's say you are having difficulty thinking about a new role or career. You feel fed up and stuck where you are but don't seem to make much progress in moving things forward. Your thoughts (and internal language) could be like this:

'I've not done anything new for so long I wouldn't know where to start.'


I'm rubbish at learning. I was rubbish at school, always at the bottom and behind everyone else.'


'So many other people out there are better than me it's not even worth having a go.'


So for me as an N.L.P. coach, I can hear a lot of the language patterns in the above that wire the brain to create blocks for a person. My job as a coach is to listen out for those language patterns and see how they can be challenged and changed. Respectfully. Always respectfully. Sometimes even with a lightness, that doesn't feel heavy and burdensome.

Interested in finding out more? Do get in touch

t: 07501817739

e: nicolashelleycoach@gmail.com

And absolutely nothing like this. But I do love Gary Larson!


© Copyright 2016 Nicola Shelley